Poetry Jokes

Allan Wolf’s Poetry Jokes are meant for the sole pleasure of people with a sense of humor. If you want to reprint these jokes for profit or other worldly gain you need my PERMISSION!

Seems like every occupation has it’s own special jokes, lawyers, doctors, banjo players. Well the Po-Biz is no exception. Here are a few poetry jokes guaranteed to make you a sensation at the next open mic. Some are original. Some are stolen. A couple are even funny. If you have any po-jokes to share, let me know and I’ll add ‘em to the list.

Po-Joke #1
Question: Why do Cowboys write poetry?
Answer: Because they’re inspired by the moos.

Po-Joke #2
Question: Why didn’t the angry farmer divorce his wife when she traded
their prize milking cow for a book of poetry?
Answer: Because he vowed to love her for butter or verse.

Po-Joke #3
Question: What did the poet say to Luke Skywalker?
Answer: “Metaphors be with you.”

Po-Joke #4
Question: Why did the boy poet introduce himself to the girl poet?
Answer: Because he wanted to meter.

Po-Joke #5
Question: What do baby poets play with?
Answer: Tanka trucks.

Po-Joke #6
Question: Why do poets despise writing commercial jingles?
Answer: Because jingles are ad-verse.

Po-Joke #7
Question: Where do poems come from?
Answer: Poe-trees.

Po-Joke #8
Question: Where do poets obtain poetic licenses?
Answer: From the DMV, the Department of Metrical Verse.

Po-Joke #9
Question: What’s a Grecian Urn?
Answer: About twenty thousand drachmas a year after taxes.

Po-Joke #10
A nurse is giving a young medical intern a tour of the hospital.
The intern approaches one bedridden patient and asks, “Why are you here?” The patient replies, “Wee sleket cowerin’ timrous beastie/O, what a panic is in thy breastie.”
The intern moves on to the next bed and asks the same question, “Why are you here?” The patient answers, “O, my luv is like a red, red, rose that’s newly sprung in June.”
The intern moves on to a third bed and asks again, “Why are you here” to which the third patient replies, “The best laid plans of mice and men, may often gang awry.”
At this the intern turns to the nurse and asks, “What ward is this anyway.” And the nurse answers, “It’s the Burns Unit.”

Po-Joke #11
Question: What is the highest honor among Cowboy poets?
Answer: Poet lariat.

Po-Joke #12
Question: How do poets say good bye?
Answer: “I’d like to linger a little longer but it’s getting aliter-ate.”

Po-Joke #13
Question: What is a metaphor?
Answer: For grazin’ yer cattle.

Po-Joke #14
Question: What is a simile?
Answer: It’s like a metaphor.

Po-Joke #15
Question: How do poets say hello?
Answer: Hey, haven’t we metaphor?

Po-Joke #16
Question: How does a poet sneeze?
Answer: Haiku!!!

Po-Joke #17
Question: Why are poets always so poor?
Answer: Because rhyme doesn’t pay.

Po-Joke #18
Question: What did William Wordsworth mean by “a spontaneous
overflow of emotion recollected in tranquility”?
Answer: Puberty.

Po-Joke #19
Question: How is a book of poetry like O.J. Simpson’s testimony.
Answer: Nobody buys either one of them.

Po-Joke #20
Question: Why did the traffic cop give the poet a ticket?
Answer: For driving without a poetic license.

Po-Joke #21
Question: When is a carpenter with a 2×4 like a poem?
Answer: When he’s a sawin’ it.

Po-Joke #22
Question: What do you get when you combine Robert Frost and James Bond?
Answer: The Road Not Shaken but Stirred.

Po-Joke #23
Question: What’s big and gray and writes poetry?
Answer: T.S. Elephant.

Po-Joke #24
Question: Why was John Keats always hounded by creditors?
Answer: Because he Ode so much.